On the outside looking in, most people say they want something but don’t really mean it. I am one of those people. We are all one of those people. They key to not being one of the people who says they want something but deep down don’t really want it lies in your actions.
Your actions will tell you how bad you want something. You say you want to be fit right? Well how bad do you want to be fit? Do you want to be fit more badly then you want to be comfortable? Do you want to be fit so bad that you’re willing to sacrifice your social life and maintain a strict diet. To most people the answer is no. I want to be very fit. I want the rock hard abs, the striations in my chest, the shoulder definition and the tree trunk legs. The question is how bad do I really want it. I want it so bad that I am in the gym every single day getting closer to achieving my goals. I want it so bad that my social life is taking a hit because I can’t go and hang out overnight. I need my sleep. I want it so bad that I have to start my morning with a gym workout or I’ll feel like my day hasn’t started yet. I want a great body so bad that I am diligent about what I eat every single day.
Saying you want something and actually really wanting something is different. I want to achieve my fitness goals to the point that every activity I do every day reflects this.
I want to achieve my fitness results really badly. I also want to reach financial stability really badly. I want to reach financial stability even more than I want rock hard abs. When the choice arises between putting my attention on growing my business or chasing my fitness goals. I will choose to channel my focus on my fitness goals 100% of the time. At the present moment, I am much more interested in reaching financial stability then achieving a great body. Hell yeah I want to achieve both of them. It will take me much longer to achieve both of those things simultaneous instead of giving the one I want to achieve the most a priority on my focus. This is why I have not been to the gym the last two days. I decided as much as I want to go to the gym and get that rock hard body, I would rather spend my time learning and finding ways that I can improve my business so as to reach financial stability.
Success goes where attention goes
What every you put your attention to is what you will receive more of in your life. Your attention is the most valuable thing that you have in this world. Your attention = your time. If you invest your attention on things that will improve your life then your life will improve. If you spend your attention on finding ways to grow your business and get more clients. Your business will grow and get more clients.
On the other hand you can choose to focus your attention on things that will only bring you vanishing pleasure. Quick releases of dopamine then you’re back to where you started. Scrolling endlessly on social media, watching tv, spending time gossiping and interacting with people who aren’t enhancing your life in any way. Your attention is very important and the majority of people give it out cheaply to things and people with no merit.
How to Focus on Things That Matter
Disclaimer.This is not an easy fix. This will be painful. You’ll have to cut out people from your life that you really love, you’ll have to cut out lots of activities you had interest in but weren’t in alignment with your goals. Below is a 5 step process I use to help focus my attention on the things that matter:
- Identify and WRITE DOWN ON PAPER what it is you want out of life. No matter how silly and vain it will be. Don’t lie to yourself. You want a mansion in the hills with 3 girlfriends. Write it all down.
- From that list, narrow it down to the top 3 most important things you want to achieve in your life
- Monitor your behavior and how you spend your time for the next 2 weeks. Write down all the things that you do that do not aid in any way to your 3 goals
- HARD PART. Cut out everything that does not help you to move you closer to your goals.
- Rinse and repeat. Keep notes of all the things you do, continuously cut out things that detract you from your vision.
Change your Focus; Change your Life
Once you’ve undertaken that hard part of figuring out what it is that you want out of life, you can then proceed to direct your focus on the things that will have a direct effect on your vision. You have to be cognizant of where your attention goes. Notice your attention going on things that drain you instead of moving you closer to your goals; cut it out. Spend your attention on things that will help you get to where you want. Whatever you focus on is what you will be getting more off. You have the power to change what you focus on. Follow the five steps listen above and you will no doubt achieve what ever it is you plan on doing. I myself use that list to find out what I want and track all my day-to-day activities that do not lead me closer to my goals and eliminate them. Eliminating the detrimental things and people who sap at your limited attention is the hardest part of those 5 steps. Once you manage to do that though, you will have significantly more time to focus on the activities that really matter.
It all boils down to how bad do you really want it. Do you want it bad enough that you will do whatever it takes to get it. Will you get rid of your friends, family, significant other to achieve your goals. Ask yourself those question. Be honest with yourself. If you want it bad enough, you will do whatever it takes to get it.
-From Barnes & Noble in Union Square with love