From The Desk of Abdoulaye
New York City
22:40

Dear Friend,

Today’s topic is going to be a banger. Your relationship might change forever. You might find yourself single at the end of this article so proceed with caution. What is cheating really? Is sleeping with someone else cheating? Is flirting with someone else cheating? Let’s dive deep and find out.

What Classifies Cheating

You wake up one day and it’s been two years since you started dating. Your love for each other grows stronger ever day. The sex is nastier and kinkier than ever. Way better than your expectations. You get out of bed, go through your morning routine then head to your local coffee shop to do some work.

As you walking in, you notice something you hadn’t seen before. Some giant delicious titties belonging to the new barista. You walk over to the counter. Your eyes catch each others. Immediately you feel a jolt of electricity running through your body which transforms into a raging boner strong enough to cut wood.

You did not plan any of this. It just happened. Is that considered cheating? Now you’re sitting here with your coffee, mind far away from work, both of you exchanging glances every now and then. All you can think about is taking here right here right now in the storage room outback. If you did that, would that be considered cheating?

Let’s reverse the roles real quick..

You’re at a pool party with your girlfriends, your man couldn’t make it today. And you even brought an extra sexy bikini so that he could shower you with attention and adoration. Oh well guess you’re just going to lay on this comfortable chair and get your tan on.

As you look towards the pool, your jaw drops. Who is he? You observe as he uses his muscular arms to lift himself out of the pool. Now he’s standing there majestically. He runs his hands across his face to wipe the water from his eye. He shakes his head from side to side to get some of the water out of his long luscious hair. You’re there drool forming on the corners of your mouth as you study him intently.

Your eyes start drifting down his body, and on top of having a handsome face, he has the physique of a Greek god. The water dripping down his chiseled chest, running down to his washboard abs all the way down to his….. Jesus Christ wtf is that. That is the biggest bulge you’ve ever seen.

You’ve been so absorbed with him that you haven’t even noticed that your nipples have gotten so hard, they’re about to pole holes through your bikini top. And let’s not even talk about the puddle forming on the chair you’re sitting. What are these emotions you’re feeling? Is this cheating? What if you wanted to hook up with him? Would that be cheating? It’s not like you planned on it. You love your boyfriend and you want to spend the rest of your life with him. But good god this man in front of you right now is making your body do things you have absolutely no control over.

Well, is it cheating?

Well, that depends. It depends on the type of relationship you have. First off, let’s establish a clear definition of cheating that we agree on. I’m not going to look at the dictionary for one. I’ll tell you one right now. Cheating, is the act of misrepresenting yourself. Cheating is when you tell someone something, but end up doing something else. If you never misrepresent yourself, you can never cheat.

Back to those two scenarios. Well, is it cheating? Again. It depends on the type of relationship you have. Did you explicitly communicate with your partner, that there will be no more hooking up with anybody else? Did you communicate with your partner that there would be no more developing feelings for other people? Did you communicate with your partner that there would be no more flirting with other people?

If you did all of that, then you should stick to what you said no matter what. I don’t care if the relationship starts turning sour. It doesn’t matter if you start losing attraction for each other. It doesn’t matter if the bedroom action has turning into “get it over as quick as possible so I can go sleep situation”. If you deviate from what you said, you are a cheater. No if’s and buts about it. You misrepresented yourself. Therefore, you’re a cheater.

If on the other hand you never explicitly communicated these things with your partner. You believe it to be a common understanding. You believe that they should know better. You set yourself up for failure with that one. All is fair game since you never communicated about it. There can be no cheating since there was no representation to be upheld.

What is cheating really? Two people can do the same thing but once of them is a cheater and the other isn’t. The simple answer is a case of misrepresentation. As long as you never misrepresent yourself, you can never be labeled a cheater. You can be in a committed marriage, have seventeen girlfriends and twelve mistresses and still not be a cheater if you never misrepresented yourself.

After reading this, you should understand that cheating is the act of misrepresenting yourself. So even if you’re dating someone and they haven’t been with anyone else except you, but they’ve lied about who they are, they are a cheater. Plain and simple.

I hope this will make you think about how you represent yourself to your partners. Honesty is the way to go to maintain a healthy relationship.

Until Next Time
Your man

Abdoulaye